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Why Does My Toddler Hit Himself? Helpful Info You Should Know

why does my toddler hit himself

Most of us have seen a child hit something or someone out of anger or frustration. A child’s behavior can be less than perfect, and especially when dealing with big feelings they simply don’t understand.

However, if you’ve seen toddlers hit themselves or your own toddler does this, it may be a bit more daunting.

Self-harm in the form of hitting oneself is an off-putting act to witness. So when children hit themselves, parents may rush to think there must be something seriously wrong with their little one.

This article will tackle the question: Why does my toddler hit himself sometimes? Do babies hit themselves because there is something wrong with them? Should I call my child’s doctor or my child’s pediatrician immediately?

Hopefully, this article will give you the answers you’ve been looking for and help to put your mind at ease.

Why does my toddler hit himself?

Kids hit when they are frustrated. Most adults have seen it occur. 

Your child may get upset and push or hit their younger brother or sister. Or they may throw something.

But when you witness your toddler banging their head against the wall or a baby hitting themselves in the head or face, that’s a different scenario.

Don’t rush to a specialist or a doctor immediately if you see your little toddler hitting themselves. There are several reasons that this may be occurring. 

Using the process of elimination, consider deciphering through any other symptoms your child is experiencing that may explain this odd violent display.

The following are some reasons babies hit themselves.

why does my toddler hit himself

1. Ear infection

Ear infections are unpleasant and downright painful. For a nonverbal toddler or baby, smacking at their face or head can signify that they have a sore ear.

Many parents have seen their babies tug at their ears or favor one side of their face when their ear hurts. When a slightly older toddler has an ear infection, the pain isn’t something that can be communicated well, so they may lash out by hitting themselves, much in the same way a baby tugs their ear.

2. Physical stimulation

Some kids hit themselves, believe it or not, to self-soothe. 

Sometimes, sad or tired children may slap at themselves or hit themselves lightly, not to cause physical pain or self-injury, but to calm down or get to sleep.

Older children can usually communicate a little better when they’re tired, sad, or anxious. Younger babies can suck their thumb, be held when crying, or use a pacifier.

A toddler may have no real way of letting you know they feel tired or overwhelmed, so hitting may ensue.

3. Sensory input

If your daughter or son hits themselves and it’s causing both you and your partner, daycare teacher, or family to be concerned, it may be nothing more than your child expressing that they require sensory input. In other words, they just want to feel something.

A buildup of energy, big feelings, or restlessness can give a child a need for physical stimulation. 

Try to redirect this to a safe environment and encourage play in an appropriate way.

Run, jump on a trampoline, ride a tricycle, and build with blocks. Find a different outlet that your child can derive pleasure from.

4. Temper tantrum

As discussed above, toddlers engage in odd forms of self-soothing sometimes. A tantrum can result in pain-related hitting to a toddler’s body when that self-soothing isn’t there.

Sometimes your child may start hitting because they are angry, unsatisfied, didn’t get what they want, or are sad.

Because these are all complicated feelings to process, they can present as a tantrum, which means that your child may hit others, or even themselves.

5. Attention seeking

If your toddler hits themselves and you’re sure that it’s not for any of the other reasons listed above, it can be that your child is engaging in this behavior to get your undivided attention.

Toddlers want you to pay attention to them all of the time. While you can sometimes get them to engage in independent play behavior, other times, when they want you to pay attention and interact with them, toddlers may strike themselves to get that attention.

To small kids and toddlers, any sort of attention is good attention. 

So even if the behavior they engage in causes you frustration but gets your undivided attention; to your kids, it’s worth repeating it when they feel ignored.

6. Stress

You may think kids have no reason to be stressed, but this isn’t true. Children are presented with stressful situations frequently.

If they want to tell you something but don’t have the ability or know how to convey it to you, if they are under-stimulated or experiencing frustration or worry – all of these things can make it hard to stay calm. They may hit or slap themselves in the head or face to get you to notice or relieve stress.

This behavior from children is rarely done to cause actual pain. When it’s caused by stress, it’s more because they want to self-soothe.

As a parent, the best thing you can do in this situation is to try to stay calm rather than reacting in frustration or anger.

7. Curiosity and body control

Younger babies and toddlers engage in hitting themselves sometimes simply as a way to learn their bodies, discover new sensations, and gain control of their limbs.

Hitting on the head lightly while trying to eat or sleep, for example, may simply be an attempt to figure out where and how their own body takes up space.

While it may seem odd to the parent, this hitting leads to spatial development, body control, and awareness.

why does my toddler hit himself

When to worry

Sometimes, hitting behavior is a reason to see a doctor or seek medical attention.

While you probably have little or nothing to be concerned about, if you notice your kid trying to cope by hitting themselves, you may want to take a moment to ask yourself if any of these causes for actual concern are things that your child is doing.

1. Illness

Teething causes pain and may result in biting, hitting, chewing, and pulling on oneself. This is normal and one of many effective ways to get some relief.

However, if your child is doing these things and is not cutting a tooth, feeling warm or feverish, puking, crying uncontrollably, or just looking ill, it may be time for some medical advice.

If your child needs medical help or medications for an earache, viral infection, or other illness, hitting the same place over and over isn’t going to lead to your kid feeling better on their own. 

Talk to your doctor to see if medical treatment is needed.

2. Developmental delays

Small children develop skills at different rates. That’s normal and usually requires no medical advice.

However, if your child is well past the age at which they should have been able to speak, walk, or perform another essential developmental milestone, your child may be angry that it has yet to happen.

Lashing out over a desire to do what their peers can do and not being able to speak to you, or do something else they have tried and not accomplished, can cause a small child to start striking themselves.

Speaking with your doctor to see if further testing should be done is usually a good idea.

3. Autism

In very rare cases, hitting oneself is a sign of autism. 

If all your child is doing is striking himself, then don’t automatically assume he’s autistic.

Autism has many other symptoms and flags that doctors look for when diagnosing a child. 

These include behavior such as not making eye contact, not processing emotions, tics like hand flapping and spinning, a compulsive need for routine, and not answering to one’s own name.

Slapping, punching, kicking, or pinching oneself is not enough to get a diagnosis. However, if you are concerned or have noticed other markers for this condition, it’s best to speak with your doctor.

Why toddlers hit themselves

There are many reasons your little one may lash out and cause harm to themselves. It is rarely because they want to feel pain.

While it’s not a super common occurrence, it does occur in small children from time to time and is usually no immediate cause for concern.

Observe your little one’s overall behavior, including the lead-up to what sets it off. This will give you clues as to why it’s being done. 

From that point, you can take appropriate steps to correct it or seek treatment.

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